Society tells us to put on a happy face whenever we feel blue. The result is, we end up ignoring what's true -- and avoiding our actual experience. Has something bad happened? Did someone say or do something that hurts when you think about it? Instead of turning away from the pain, try turning toward it.
In Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings By Letting Yourself Have Them by Psychotherapist Tina Gilbertson, Tina describes the counterintuitve but powerful truth about how difficult feelings can lead to greater happiness. Wallowing constructively is not a just a skill but a lifestyle, a new way to be the best version of the same you.
When you immerse yourself in your real feelings with self-compassion, you experience emotional healing. The feelings move through you faster, and then they're gone.
You get yourself back, along with energy to start moving forward in the right direction. This feels great, so you become happier as you heal. And that happiness is not just a surface thing, but a deep joy that comes from feeling whole and good about who you are.