The quality of a person’s relationships dictates the quality of their life. Healthy relationships, whether professional or personal aren’t just about being happier and nicer, they are also about learning resilience during the tough times. Confidence Coach Laure Redmond joined us to share a few relationship tools that work in the office and at home:
- Small Things Often At The Gottman Institute, an organization dedicated to the research of emotional disengagement, keeping the focus on positivity is very important to keep people moving towards each other, and not further apart. This is easy to do if two people engage in small, routine points of contact that demonstrate appreciation.
- Would You Date Yourself How many times do you catch yourself thinking or saying: “If only that person would ” YOU are the captain of your life, YOU are in charge of how you react at any given moment to whatever is in front of you. Challenge your own negative tendencies and tap into your deeper wisdom. Happiness is a sense of purpose and fulfillment and it can only come from inside of you. Fall in love with your own being, date yourself now.
- Don’t Act Out While Triggered If you can’t help yourself from getting mad, take a break by heading out to the gym, reading a book, playing with the dog or calling a friend — the power of pause and learning how to manage stress - takes you off the path of relationship destruction.
- Positive Illusions Reduce the amount of time you spend dwelling on someone’s negative aspects. The brain is built to remember the nasty things that people say, but if you can overlook those things and just focus on what’s important, it’s good for the body, good for the mind and good for the relationship.
- Practice Empathy and Active Listening Emotional responsiveness is all about sending a cue and having the other person respond to it. It’s not just about ~ will you help me with the chores? It’s about emotional synchronicity and being tuned in to each other. In successful relationships, people empathize with each other; understanding the other person's perspective instead of constantly trying to be right.
- Know The Danger Cues Criticism, rejection, defensiveness, and withdrawl signal danger and unsafety to the brain. Learn how to express needs without criticism.
- Resolve Conflicts Pro-actively Use assertiveness skills so that others don’t walk all over you and your voice is not silenced.
You can listen to Laure on "Feel Good Naked Radio." For more helpful information, visit Laure's website. She's also available for private coaching for individuals or groups.